Finding a POT is difficult, but keeping him is equally as hard! As soon as you get talking to a man, set up a meeting ASAP. I say this because there are: picture collectors, guys who just want to text, lonely guys wanting to Skype. And trust me when I say that a man will waste your time! If you’ve found a guy you’d like to be in an arrangement with, hopefully he will ask you out for coffee or a meal pretty quickly. If not, it’s not weird or rude or uncommon to just go ahead and ask him if he’d like to meet. There are a few ground rules that are good to follow:
1. Always meet in a public place – This might seem like common sense, but keep it in mind. First and foremost, you want to be safe. NO HOTEL ROOMS, APARTMENTS, HOMES, FRIENDS HOMES, PARKING LOTS. Just don’t do it, Okay?
2. Do NOT discuss money – “But I’m a Sugar Baby!” Yeah yeah, I know. I am telling you how to get the MOST out of your money. Many will disagree with this, but I never talk money on or before the first meeting. Not just his money, but also don’t discuss yours. Don’t seem desperate or he will low ball you! Let the first meeting be that, a first meeting. Ask about him, let him ask about you. Let him be able to see you as a person rather than a business transaction. The more you get him to like you the more money you can get.
Can you get money or gifts on the first date? Yes. However, the only time I see it appropriate to ask for compensation is when you are traveling an excessive amount or if you are taking off work to fit his schedule (of which you could ask for a reimbursement for the money you had invested into the date). Sometimes you may even get a generous date who will take it upon himself to compensate you for the date to let you know he is serious.
3. Do NOT sleep with him – This is how girls get screwed over. Do NOT let yourself be alone with him on the first meeting. You will end up fucked and broke or worse- on the 5 o’ clock news with the headline MISSING. If you are looking to become an escort then do separate research for that. Although sugar babies and escorts are similar in many ways, it is a whole different ball game in how meetings and getting paid works. I cannot stress this enough. DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES AGREE (or allow yourself to get talked into) SEX DURING THE FIRST MEETING. You are putting yourself in a very comprisable position for rape, kidnapping, STD’s, and just plain out getting fucked and left high and dry.
If you are not going to heed my warning against this, then at least make sure you get your payment up front (and then pray that you don’t get knocked on the head and robbed afterwards.
4. Transport yourself – Before you’ve been with him a while, you should drive yourself, take a bus, a cab, or have a friend drive you to your dates. This also means don’t have him pick you up down the road or something. DON’T GET IN A VEHICLE/PRIVATE PLACE WITH HIM. Just don’t risk it.
5. Keep the conversation flowing – There are a lot of things you can talk about. Ask him about his job, his interests, his favorite places to eat anything to keep him talking. Be careful talking about his personal life, if he gives short, quick answers then move on. There are a lot of men who are married with kids and want to keep their life discrete. While you are on this date take mental notes: what does he like, what does he eat, where does he work, does he like sports. Things like this can help you research later, and get to learn more about his interests. Learn what he likes and impress him with it later! I noticed a POT I had met once before always drank lemon water, on our 3rd date I beat him there and ordered his drink. He was very impressed that I bothered to remember what he drank and that def helped me when it came time to discuss an allowance. The small things can be noticed.
Don’t over talk about yourself. Don’t complain about your family or your friend Tiffany that your boyfriend left you for. Don’t talk about personal aspects of your life (like where you work, go to school, home address, etc) until after you get to know him better. This will prevent you from a dangerous situation later on if the date goes south. Don’t get stalked.
